Edition Fifteen: Word Verification Explanations

Time for another selection of words I've typed in to convince Blogger and Wordpress that it is indeed a human being wishing to comment on someone else's online input. These are just a few that have been keyed in and what, in a parallel universe, they might mean:

Gunab - the bloke chosen from the audience by belly dancers, comedians and singing drag queens. Gunabs are invariably shy, unwilling and too frightened to say 'no'. See: Love Chunks.

Manesacr - cutting one's hair to win the approval or at the insistence of a loved one/to avoid continued lice infestations/to be able to see/attend a job interview and be in genuine contention for the role. Always done with a great public show of reluctance but the person undergoing Manesacr knows - deep, deep inside - that it's for the best.

Lobsli - the mess incurred during and after the eating of whole crustaceans, especially when a bib, bowl of finger-dipping water and removal of claws and poo pipes (the food, not the eater's) are required.

Manco - unlike Lobsli which occurs at nice restaurants or well-catered for Christmas day events, Manco mostly happens on casual picnics or at the workplace and means the effects of eating a mango by hand. Manco produces sticky fingers and also leaves a bit of pulp string in between the front teeth, some unflattering (and highly questionable) orange splats on white shirt fronts and a lingering, perfumey pong in the waste paper basket.

Spitte - any gesture of contempt executed by a classy person.

Ansuboph - embarrassing rectal experiments conducted at home that end up in the Accident and Emergency ward with the excuse for the predicament invariably being, "I slipped and fell on this (insert the words: gerbil, cucumber, night light or egg beater here)."

Ansubophs are taken seriously and duly written down by the attending doctor when in the presence of the patient but are laughed at and shared around in the tea room afterwards. Particularly creative Ansubophs sometimes feature at medical students' end-of-year functions, complete with accompanying x-rays, chart notes and photographs.