Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Mrs Nosey

Is email snooping on my nine-year old's In-box a bad thing?

If it is, then I'm guilty of it. When I saw these two emails though, my heart melted. After school today - and before the final inspection at 6pm - I'll take Sapphire out for an icecream at Cibos (her favourite) and we'll walk Milly in the park until Love Chunks gets home.

And I'll give them both a big hug, and then call up my Dad to tell him how much I love him too.

-----Original Message-----

From: Sapphire Lockett
Sent: Monday, 13 October 2008 7:45 PM
To: Grandpa

Dear Grandpa,

Guess what two words I can spell?
Malevolent and Manoevrability.
Do you have any new words to spell?
Grandpa, what do you do when you don't know to either feel happy or sad because so much is going on?

I feel that way at the moment. Mum and Dad are really busy with all the drama about the house and I just wanted to ask you.

From Sapphire xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo (size five-out-of-ten hugs)

Sent: Monday, 13 October 2008 9:00 PM
To: Sapphire Lockett
Subject: RE: Spelling

My darling grand daughter

Spelling words first: (1) Which is correct - acommadation, acomadation, accomadation, accommadation, acommodation, acomodation, accommodation, or accomodation?

Perhaps none of them?
(2) Which is correct - embarass, embarras, embarrass, embaras, or none of them?

Now to your very thoughtful question (and I will try to give a thoughtful answer).

If I have a choice on how to feel about something, I always try to take the positive, or optimistic, way to feel because it makes me feel cheerful rather than sad, and if I try to convince myself that something is a GOOD thing then sometimes I can come to believe that it is, and then it really IS a good thing.

If you start off trying to think that something is GOOD, you can always modify it to not-quite-as-good-as-I-hoped, or not-really-all-that-good, etc., but it's pretty hard to start off thinking something is bad and then trying to convince yourself that it isn't. This might be a bit of a tangle of words - I'm sorry if it is, but I think you'll be able to work it out if you re-read it once or twice. If you can't, I'll try to explain it more clearly when I see you - talking usually doesn't cause as much misunderstanding as writing.

If a glass has some water in it, some people see the glass as half empty and others see the same glass as half full, yet it's the same glass. Half empty is the negative, or pessimistic, way to see it, where half full is the positive, or optimistic, way to see the same glass. When we look at a situation, I think it is best to VERY CONSCIOUSLY try to take the OPTIMISTIC or POSITIVE view of it. Not only does this help ourselves, but helps the people nearest and dearest to us as well.
You are naturally a cheerful, positive sort of person, and I really believe you are, and will be, very good at seeing the positive side of things (though sometimes it isn't easy, and we have to try very hard to do that).
The house, and the move, are VERY big things for Mum and Dad, and you might feel that your thoughts and feelings are being neglected a bit. I think that things might be a bit easier after the auction on Thursday. I know, for an absolute certainty from talking to Mum and Dad, that what is going to be best for YOU, the person they love more than anyone or anything in the world, is of the very greatest importance to both of them. They may not always be able to tell you that, but you know, and can always be sure, that this is true!

If you would like me to carefully try to remind Mum and Dad of how you might be feeling, I will. I won't mention it to them if you would rather I didn't. You might prefer to talk to them yourself.
We all love you HUGELY, Sapphire, and would do anything to help you in this pretty tough time.
Thank you very much for trusting me with this VERY important question. I hope I have helped a bit.
All my love,

Grandpa xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
(any sized hug you like!)


Anonymous said...

Not at all, I intend to spy away when my kids are old enough to use the computer. You have to these days.
Your daughter sounds like such a thoughtful and introspective kid. Are you sure she's only nine? That conversation between her and her grandfather is so sweet. He seems like such a good influence on her, it's great that she can talk to him.

franzy said...

Nah - spy away. My feeling is that when she's got stuff that she REALLY doesn't want you to see, you won't be seeing it!

When I think of the half glass problem, I see the half empty glass as being half drunk by me and so I'm not as thirsty as I was when it was full. This is a positive thing.
The half full glass is being filled by me only half way because I ran out of the water. This seems negative.

I think it depends of the context of the situation. Did you come across the glass by yourself? Did someone produce it from behind their back and ask you to describe how much water is in it?
I think that witnessing the transitional state of the water (previously entering the glass or leaving it) greatly effects what you end up describing it as.

Shoot me now. I'm going back to mark more grant applications ...

River said...

What a wonderful grandpa. A real treasure. My daughter monitors her children's computer usage too.

Baino said...

Firstly. Shame on you! You should have stopped when you saw the address was Grandpa! C'mon, you knew it was his email! I'm all for monitoring usage but seriously!

Secondly, your Dad is AMAZING. Not just because he uses email, and not just because he's an awesome grandpa but he is very wise. My kids at 21 and 23 have a wonderful relationship with their paternal grandparents even though their dad is not even a memory for them. Grandma logs into Facebook to keep track of Clare's travels (well someone else does it for her at Senior Citz) but they're far from 'connected. Your Saph is a lucky girl to have such a lovely man in which to confide. And you're a wonderful parent to have encouraged that connection. Now spy but don't open!

Miles McClagan said...

Well, someone sent me an e-mail with an equally important question came from the Nigerian royal family no less...

Denise said...

Sapphire is a lucky girl to have such a lovely grandfather.

River said...

I'm on tenterhooks here, the suspense is enormous.......Did the house sell? Did it sell well? are you (temporarily) rich beyond your wildest dreams?