Sunday, May 03, 2009

Odds and Sods

I've had angoing migraine these past few days that keeps returning more often than a blowfly to a barbecue plate.

So much so that Sapphire and her sleepover friend Juliet made me breakfast in bed. Or was that breakfast ON the bed, because Juliet stumbled and the orange juice glass toppled over and gave me a rather wakeful splashing.

Never mind. What brought the second round of tears to my eyes (OJ's acidity is particularly harsh), was the card they made for me:

Creative spelling aside, I'm going to assume that 'excentric' is meant in the positive, full-of-character sense; not the Weirdo Weirdo WEIRDO sense.

It got me thinking about Mothers' Day which is next Sunday here in Australia (and presumably most places overseas wherever junk mail and TV are prevalent).

Sapphire keeps asking me what I want for the big MD.

"Nothing, honestly," is my answer, before I stroke her hair, scrunch her to my side in a quick hug and then hope she'll drop the subject.

"But Mum, I can't get you NOTHING. I'll feel really bad and ungrateful for the rest of the day. There must be something you'd like me to get for you."

The brochures she'd carefully spread out on the table were about as enticing as the 'home made' muesli she and Juliet had prepared the morning earlier - indescribably messy with lots of gawdy ingredients that weren't worth touching.

I'm not a jewellery gal. I've got my wedding and engagement rings, plus a 'ten year' anniversary one that all fit together on one finger. My Grandma's wedding ring is on my right middle finger which adds a rather glamourous flash of gold when my 'Eff You' gesture is occasionally called up and I have three gold bangles that I never take off; not for running, sleeping or showering. Anything else is likely to get snagged on my ever-present polar fleece jackets, attract blobs of stray hand moisturiser or just be mislaid.

"Just make me one of your fantastic cards, I really love them and I've kept every single one you've made."

She rolled her eyes and muttered, "But they don't count," as she walked outside to pat Skipper.

I tried to think. A new pair of running shoes would be nice, but handing over my rather worn-out and certainly odorific purple orthotics to Sapphire with a written list of shoe brands that accommodate my narrow feet and low in-step would take the mystery out of things a bit.

Even books are a bit superfluous, sadly. I review them, so always have a couple there on my bedside table waiting to be read, which is actually a rather lovely situation to be in. Having ones there that have been paid for will only ruin the experience and besides, just having the Saturday and Sunday editions of The Age provides enough 'down time' reading with all of its assorted magazines, inserts, segments and insight sections for the rest of the week.

A meal out at a fancy restaurant? Meal, yes; restaurant, maybe; but fancy, No. Instead, I'd go for a friendly cafe that serves all-day breakfasts or chaotic Yum Cha, decent souvlaki, crispy pizza or one that makes pungently, spicy and slurpy laksa for throngs of homesick Chinese students. Someplace where jeans and sneakers are the norm and not heels, mascara or low-cut tops, and we can turn up at 6:00pm and be well-fed and walking back home by 8pm, ready for a night in so that I can pat Milly and be within easy reach of Love Chunks, chocolate and red wine. Whilst wearing ugg boots.

And then, I spotted it. I beckoned Sapphire back over. "You know what, love? You can get me anything you like. ANYTHING."

She beamed. "Really?"

"Yep. Except for this."

She busied herself reading through all of the dot points that the marvellous 'Mrs Peggs Handy Line' claimed to have. "Why have they said that this is the 'Ideal Gift for Mum'? There's no fun in this."

That's right my beautiful, wondrous, clever young treasure. So, if I get juice in my eye again, or a pair of Peacock feather dangly earrings (trust me; it's been suggested more than once) or even the fake Aboriginal dot-painted boomerang that she admired yesterday during our foray at the Queen Vic markets, I'll be grateful.


Terence McDanger said...

Horribile. Excentric.

Bad spelling is so endearing in children, but I slap adults with a wet kipper when they do it.

Raising yourself a fine young one there Kath.

The Blakkat said...

Ah, that's gorgeous Kath. Hope the migraine has shifted and no doubt a lovely MD awaits you, whether you get an indoor clothes hanging implement or not. Loved your fart post, too (and subsequent comments). You can't beat a fart post, ever.

ashleigh said...

Suggestion time.

Our two have had all the usual BS applied - the fathers and mothers day stalls at school with the pressure to buy Buy BUY! Show Dad or Mum you really CARE.

We've explained patiently that STUFF does not show you care, actions show.

Over the years we've moved from stuff, to knock up a quick home-made card on a piece of paper to the ultimate.

"Whadda ya want for XXx's day?"

Answer: A hug and a cup of tea would be just perfect.

They seem happy with it. The idea of doing something seems to go down well, not spending goes well also, and... its far more meaningful.

Try it.

Baino said...

Kindred spirits all I think. I want a new knob for my bathroom door . .really I do! I will get some nice flowers from Woollies and a little treat of some kind but we've gone byond the spending a lot on rubbish to being a little more pragmatic. Love, Love your card and mine are still invariably hand made . .oh wait . .I did get a voucher for a massagae last year and that was very nice!

Kath Lockett said...

Terence, I agree completely. Stay tuned soon for a post on some signs spotted with incorrect spelling. No wonder one of them closed down.

Thanks Blakkat - nice to see you here again (getting cracking on that meme, y'hear?). Nice also to know that another intelligent and sophisticated lady out there appreciates a good fart post as well!

Ashleigh, the home made card idea wasn't 'going down' too well yesterday, but I'm going to ask that she draw something that we can frame as an artwork (ie, stick on the window frame by my desk). I reckon that might do the trick. And another breakfast-in-bed, this time without OJ or a hot beverage of any kind.

Although, as Baino suggests, a massage wouldn't be frowned upon!

Helen said...

I love your ugg boots and red wine vision, that's me as well. I would go with the Yum Cha, especially if you're inviting people to celebrate with you. I did Yum Cha for my birthday a while ago and it was great fun.

wv = "pokilina"

Helen said...

Oh, and I promise to do the meme this week. Really.

Pamela Foreman said...

The card is super sweet! My girls keep asking me what I want for Mother's Day and really, I don't want anything but some peace and quiet! Great post!

Kath Lockett said...

Helen, I'll toast you in absentia tonight, as I settle on the couch with a glass in one hand, ugg boots on both feet and chocolate within easy reach of the other hand.

And yes, meme time please!

Thanks Pamela!

The Man at the Pub said...

But surely you want what the advert told me "every mother wants this Mother's Day"... a Bunnings voucher!! How emotionally satisfying. Mrs. Pegg can stick her $189 clothes rack up her laundry chute.

Also, the "restuarant" that perfectly fits your description only with better food... Fu Lu Chinese Cafe 172 Rathdowne St. Carlton. The best schezuan chicken this side of Schezuan, and sesame prawns to die for!! (Tell Sapphire now...stat!)

River said...

We keep Mothers Day really simple around here too.I already have everything and my grown up kids know this, so gifts are bypassed. this year I'm visiting one of my daughters for coffee and doughnuts.

drb said...

I think it is always challenging to get things for mums, no matter what age we are!

What are you getting for your mum?
That will be another topic for a log.

We have run out of ideas!!!!

p.s. Laksa is thick rice round noodles in soup from Malaysia,
Singapore and Indonesia.
They are many forms due to the variations of the soup:
Curry Laksa (most popular in Singapore and Melb), Ayam Laksa, Assam Laksa, Penang Laksa, Pahang Laksa, etc...

Catherine@Simply Natural said...

Whenever I asked my dad what he wanted for father's day, he always replied 'love and understanding'. As a kid, 'socks' would have been the answer I was wanting to hear!
Hope you DO get something special on Mothers day, because you are a great mum (and a kick arse runner!).

squib said...

What a grogeous card!

I saw an ad telling people to get their mother a pink diamond for MD. What a joke

I'm getting a skyscout via the US (cos it's third the price than here), can't wait :)

Kath Lockett said...

Thanks Mr Pub. If we don't make it there for MD, it will certainly be on my 'Melbourne Munch' list to visit :)

Mmmmmm River, coffee and donuts, mmmmm.....

DrB, Mum's getting three juicy novels that are already in the post (feeling very proud of my unusual organisation skills). She's sucker for WW1, WW2 or Angela's Ashes-style sad-sack memoirs, so she's got a trifecta of misery to read this year.

Thanks Catherine - 'love and understanding' is a brilliant answer and I hope you get it in spades too.

Squib - what is a 'skyscout'? Some kind of telescope?

squib said...

It's a handheld viewer. It doesn't magnify anything but when you view a star in the sky, it will tell you what it's called and give you info on it. It has GPS

Anonymous said...

Bad mother here: When my 3 children asked what I wanted to do on mother's day, I asked "Does it have to involve you?" - how bad is that??

Jilly xx

the projectivist said...

it makes sense though, doesn't it?

horror + bile = horribile.
really they should think of changing it.

i'm hoping you get that boomerang.