Monday, April 22, 2013

Home made oysters


















The angry red bloodshot splodge changes from one eye to the other in the matter of hours, reminding me that whilst Spring has sprung in Switzerland, I am allergic to all of it.

Hayfever never troubled me in Australia, except for the three years that nasal polyps blocked each and every sinus drainage point.  This occurred during the bad old workaholic days, and my team reckoned that they knew when I was in my office (not directly visible to them) because of the window-rattling, endlessly honking nose blows.  Managerial mucus, if you will.  Thankfully, surgery occurred, scraping the inside of my face clean and then feeling the sheer relief of being able to speak without the other person looking at me with pity and inevitably asking, "Do you have a cold?"

Here, however, I'm chalking it down to a different hemisphere, different time zone, different season and different flora (and possibly fauna. Who knows what those pesky woodpeckers and squirrels do up in the trees when we're not looking).  It still seems incredible to me that bulbs can emerge when covered in thick snow and ice only six weeks earlier and trees switch from bare to bursting with blossom when my back is turned for a mere moment.

Nasal spray and tablets do help slightly and are well-earned after my attempts to act out 'hayfever' to the non-English speaking girl at the chemist.  However my walk with Milly in the mornings still results in sneezing a dozen times in a row with the air suction generated then causing every third one to be punctuated by a robust fart, pushing and shoving my body around like a disoriented set of blonde bagpipes.  Three steps back and a big one forward, thanks to the butt trumpet fighting the good fight on behalf of my itchy throat, streaming eyes and torturously tickly nose.

Milly also sneezes more than usual, but hers occur out in front of our apartment door in the marble-lined foyer by the lift doors.  "Ah-yeeeee!  Ah-yeeeeee!  Ah-yeeeeee!" reverberates down the hallway, in direct contravention of the Swiss-enforced 'no unnecessary noise before 8am on weekdays' rule.  If either of our neighbours opened their door to complain, they'd be presented with Milly's first real stretch of the day - head resting on her front paws as the rump is lifted towards them to expose a pencil sharpener arse already dilated and ready to discharge a poo in the park.

Outside and soon unencumbered by excrement exertion, she's as happy as the unknown-but-obviously-always-joyous-and-oft-referred-to Larry, scooting madly between the rows of daffodils, her paws flicking dew drops up against her belly.

This time last year she scooted in the rows of daffs, mouth open like a mobile hungry hippo as she avidly devoured the yellow petals.  This year she's either forgotten the joys of wanton destruction or has outgrown the taste.  I dawdle along behind, pausing every now and then to honk into my hanky, rub the reddest eye and do an exaggerated swallow in order to ease my throat.




It's all worth it.

20 comments:

Sabine said...

After a long winter like this last one, the nasty pollen come all at once, so it's really much tougher on hayfever sufferers than in a "normal" (?) spring. Would you not consider a visit ot an allergy/dermatology expert? There is much more that medicine can do than nasal sprays my hayfeverish friends tell me.

Plastic Mancunian said...

Bonjour Kath,

June is the month when the allergy hits me, meaning that while you are allergic to Spring, I am clearly allergic to early summer.

And it's worse in France.

Poor you. I know what you are going through.

:-(

Cheers

PM

Andrew said...

You are not the first person I have heard of who moved to Europe and suddenly starting to suffer from spring hayfever. I used to suffer from it but outgrew it. Would the locals think you were even crazier if you wore a mask to filter the air?

Elephant's Child said...

Milly in the daffodils is furry enchantment.
I suffered (how I suffered) with hayfever until I had a course of desensitising injections. A life saver. Of the ten most common allergens I wasn't allergic to cats or dogs. The others? Yes. Worth a try?
(I do love the blond bagpipes image - thank you).

FruitCake said...

Kath, it's easy to sympathise. My eyes went all red and runny when I heard Pollen Hanson wants to stand for election again.

River said...

Love Milly in the daffodils.
Take Sabine's advice and visit an allergy expert to determine exactly which allergens are affecting you. Then the appropriate medication can be prescribed. The key to effective hayfever management is preventive medication taken soon enough. (Like migraines). Don't wait until you are stuffed up and suffering.

ashleigh said...

Antihistamines are wonderful.

I've been on them for 40 years - mostly seasonal, but the end of our summer here has been a bit odd and so the normal stop-at-Christmas has seen me on them up until now. The rains have begun, hooray, so I hope to stop in the next few days.

I found similar things years ago in Europe - daffs, fields of rape (for the seed, you know), and wheat were particularly bad.

Kath Lockett said...

Sabine, it might be the next option for me if we can afford the medical bills...

PlasMan, I'm not looking forward to June but hope that maybe, possibly, hopefully I'll have the hayfever under control by then?

Andrew, I don't think a mask would shock them now - the mere fact that I'm out walking Milly WITHOUT MAKEUP and *before I've had a shower* is shocking enough.

E-Child, Milly loves the daffs and makes a beeline for them every morning, if only to run through them or sit directly on them. Not sure what the gardeners think of this behaviour though.

Noooo, FruitCake, noooooo!

River you're right, I know you're right but I'm so sick of all the medical stuff we've dealt with here in Switzerland that I'm still prepared to leave it for a while and hope that I get used to it...

Ashleigh, I might ask the GP for stronger antihistamines - anything beyond Panadol needs a prescription here. And yes, when did 'rapeseed' change to 'canola'? Not that I blame them....

Marshall Stacks said...

wow your green eyes co0rdinate so well with the bloodshot though; and
Swiss daffs look the same as ours. bless you both X X iODyne

Kath Lockett said...

Thanks Marshall Stacks - bloodshot and snot green: an alternative Christmas theme!

diane b said...

That must be a pain in the butt to be sneezing and suffering when it is such a beautiful season. Milly looks adorable in the daffs.
I used to suffer from hayfever when I was in New Guinea but luckily it went when I moved away.

Kath Lockett said...

Moving away might be too long a wait for me, dianeb!

wilbo43 said...

I feel for you, Kath. Hayfever is terrible, but on a lighter note, it usually only lasts about ten years, then you get used to spring..

Cheers,

Bill

Kath Lockett said...

TEN years, Wilbo43..??!!! Then again, Milly did look rather adorable romping through the daffodils this morning....

Red Nomad OZ said...

Maybe there's a blog post in identifying 10 things you're allergic to over yonder??!! Everyone told me I'd get hayfever in Sth OZ & they were RIGHT!! So if you didn't get it down here, it must be a pretty virulent environment for you to get it up there!

I blame the squirrel dander ....

Kath Lockett said...

Squirrel dander it must be - all the more reason for Milly to keep chasing them, Red!

ropcorn said...

Beautiful Milly among all those flowers. :-)

Kath Lockett said...

Thanks Ropcorn. We're in Avignon (Provence region in France) as I'm typing this reply, so Milly's been happily trotting amongst poppies in the long grass. That's when she's not being patted and chatted to by tourists who miss leaving their own dogs at home, of course.

brotherMonte said...

Further enjoyed this post also. I suffer terribly from sinus troubles and have had co-workers complain about it. Like I really want to be honking like a goose.

Kath Lockett said...

Thanks Brothermonte. The blog is 'resting' for a while now, but the urge to start again is starting to emerge....