Edition Seventeen: Word Verification Explanations
It's been a while since I've jotted down some of the word verification captcha thingies that need to be typed in before being permitted to add a comment or, in increasing cases, 'like' something. Here are some that popped up last week and what I think they could mean:
Flumpi - The sound of a tired arse hitting a leather lounge after a long day at work. We have a five seater modular lounge and one segment (okay, mine) is subjected to flumpi every night after the kitchen is clean and the dishwasher is on and there's a distinctly recognisable butt-cheek imprint on the leather deep enough to pour a bag of chips in.
Yalpt - the shock, agony and anguish experienced by a person undergoing their first bikini or back-crack-and-sack wax, invariably ending in screaming and swearing to deities lurking above the strip lighting in the beauty salon's back room.
Boptrig - Listening to music instead of doing maths homework. Most of 1982 through to 1984 involved huge slabs of Boptrig after dinner on a weeknight which is probably why I barely passed year eleven mathematics and think an obtuse angle is a triangle with an attitude problem.
Hosup - A group of slappers and tarts greeting each other before a big night out.
Angthro - Bad sportsmanship displayed when the loser of a point deliberately mis-hits the ball back to the server so that they have to climb the fence and retrieve it from behind the wheelie bins or interrupt the bowls game on the green next door. Designed for the winner to walk further, stop their winning flow and humiliate them just a little, especially if their teeny tiny tennis skirt blows up as they bend down.
Mognm - The first pitiful attempts at meaningful speech upon waking after imbibing a magnum of cheap champagne the night before. Sunday morning found me suffering a tiny bout of mognm after having more than my share of sparkling shiraz (and brie and water crackers) at a free outdoor classical concert. Lingering tannins, dried spittle and born again cheese tongue do not an attractive person make on God's designated day of rest.